On why Forgive

I forgive not because I lack wisdom;

I forgive not because I lack self-respect;

I forgive not because I believe the maltreatment was deserved.

I forgive because I have wisdom to;

I forgive because of my self-respect;

I forgive because no body deserves maltreatment.

Why should I counter the evil done to me with the equal measure of the evil this person has rendered me? In the same way, would I not be pairing their lack of wisdom with the same amount of the lack as a payment? Would that person's lack of self-respect be also reflected back on them through my equal measure of the same?

Can I not do better? Should I really be equal to the evil of this person's act by proving as if I am capable of the same?

This person sought to assert dominance through control, in order to fill up the measure of that person's deficiency. By surrendering my power I was quickly able to be replenished with the more of the same: better, more refreshing abundance of the refill of inner strength; yet for the other person, the more they drank it out of me the thirstier they got and emptier they were of the power they craved by stomping on others.

Being hurt by those we thought loved and cared for us is never easy. They themselves are hurting. But sometimes pride and desire for control and lack of trust also poison minds: the petty resentments and low-class jealousy and their foolish desire to make themselves more powerful by hurting those they perceive as their better should not be my problem but theirs alone. That person now feels bitter and hateful and exhausted and frustrated and not at all empowered and satisfied and even then their foolish minds still had nothing new to learn from why and how they've been bad; my mind can rest in the knowledge that I have had enough strength to refuse to render evil for evil and never to stoop to the level of another's lack of insight. I did not wish this person evil and the mere thought of how this would have heart them if I had indeed returned the evil brought me sadness and tears in my eyes. No, their acts have nothing to do with how I have always acted. Pain is very bad to receive and just as also to give. Why double this shoddy hand that I've been dealt with by this person?

Showing this person that I can hurt them the same will not accomplish anything. Pride and arrogance and haughtiness have also brought the same results of bad fruits of unrighteousness; but only true humility and patience and compassion are the only ways in my experience that have yielded abundants,

May God heal my wounds. May God give me humility. May God grant me patience and patient endurance. Such is how saints acquire the possession of their souls in the end.